Quiet Peace

There are times, where I just have to shove everything aside. Take just 5 minutes to take a deep breath. Look outside at the sky. School calls, but my heart yearns. For something more than just school more than what books can offer. I'm surrounded by people, but none reaches my inner heart. I'm alone...but not quite. Of all the times I've desire to walk a soft slow walk, my head has bent over my work. So I have learned somtimes it is best to leave and go. Somewhere where my heart is. Where no one else can touch, beacuse it is mine alone to share. The place where I am truly happy and content. Though my body can not take those walks I've yearned for, my heart has soared gently to the One who has captured my heart long ago.
All my tears are nothing compared to His. My joy can't possible matched to His delight. He know me better than anyone even myself.

As of this moment it is 10:42 at night. To my surprise, I am not yet tired. Although in truthfulness, I ought to be exhausted. College has been a challenged in many ways. The majority of it consist of 4 major things:

The first, fighting for the time to be with my Dad. There are rarely any free time, no I have to make time. This semester like all my life, I have had to rely heavily on His strength. Reminding myself why I am going to College.

The second, was being away from my parents. My mom and I have grown very close since Kate went away to college. In fact there was rarely a day that we did not spent time with each other. She is one of my dearest and best friends. I spent long hours at Pellissippi and often came home with an armful of homework with time only to do chores and dinner. The rest of my free time was taken by drama and voice. For a little bit, I had grown afraid that I'd lose that special friendship mom and I had developed over the year and half. If anything, it got stronger. Since I could not see her and Dad as often as I'd like, I was always hungry for the sight of them.

The Third, making friends is not always easy. Being Pellissippi often had me make friends or at least be friendly whether I wanted to or not. In fact, except for my last year of high school, I have made more friends in college than almost anywhere else. I have stepped multiple times out of my comfort zone in order to make a friend. I am glad I was able to take the opportunity God gave me.

The forth was perhaps other than trying to find time with God was the most difficult. I was disliking Pellissippi heavily in the beginning. I felt overwhelm, and had no time to spend with my parent or just to get my breathe. To tell the truth, I had thought of throwing it away, leaving it unfinished, and go be with my family. But I believed had I done that, I would have been struggling harder than if I kept going. I had fought so hard just to get into Pellissippi, I was not going to end the semester without fight...if nothing else I can say I gave it my all and I do not quite something without careful consideration.

Though everything I have said, I have pretty much said one thing. Rely On God. That's the only way you can make it through anything. If you need to rant to Him, my goodness rant to Him. He already know what you're thinking anyways. Just don't forget to thank Him either even for the bad choice you make. Because for every wrong choice you make, you learn. He is always there, just sometimes we can't always feel Him. That's where faith and grace come in. One last thing before I say good night. Give grace to yourself so you can extend grace to others. The worst person to beat up on yourself is you. In others words...people can criticize you, but in the end it is you who allows the critique to be effective.

Another story, one we've all heard before, but maybe different side

Have you ever read something that you get one side of the story? That side was the only one you've heard all your life and soon you believe there is nothing else new in that story? I am beginning to learn, even year after you study the scriptures or a particular story there's usually always another side.

If you do not mind, I'd love to invite you to an old, old story. One even the littlest child has probably heard. It's the story of the Lost sheep. Please, join me as I write out the story.

Now the tax collectors and the "sinners" were all getting around to hear him. But the Phariseees and the teachers of the law muttered, "This man welcomes sinners and eats with them"

Then Jesus told them this parable: Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. THen he calls his friends and neighbors together and says 'Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.' I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety- nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.

Luke 15

I have been told many times the story up to a point. So many times I have been told " The shepherd rejoiced over the 1 lost sheep over the ninety- nine who were not lost," I believe it be true.

If just one person accepts Jesus Christ, there is GREAT rejoicing in heaven. Trumpets are probably blown, angels shouts, and I have this vision of God actually getting up and dancing. I'll have to ask Him if He really does do that, but I think He does. God rejoices over just one sinner who come accepts Jesus Christ over the ninety-nine.

Here what I am trying to get to. Please take note of the beginning of the scripture and the very last sentence. Now the tax collectors and the "sinners" were all getting around to hear him. But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, "This man welcomes sinners and eats with them" The last sentence, I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety- nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.

Do you see the connection? The Pharisees and the teacher's of the law were in that parable. The verse states "...There will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents over ninety-nine righteous persons who do need to repent. That one person accepted Jesus who is grace. He was free to live, a clean slate wiped to start over. The ninety- nine (pharisees) who did not need to repent , there were no rejoicing over.

I don't know what to write really. My mind is musing over many things. Over responsibilities I must do and over the things I must study. Right now, all I want is to mull over thoughts aimless thoughts perhaps. Just write even if its not important.

Have you ever noticed the blue sky? Just stare at it, how in the middle of the sky it is the bluest. Toward the ends no matter which directions you look, north, east, west, or south it fades to the palest blue or grey? Did you ever wonder why God made the sky blue?

I love listening. To me listening is not granted to you, listening...hearing is a privilege. the rain drops falling on rooftops. The wind singing as it twirls around me. Birds twittering their glad songs. My mom telling me "She is glad that I'm hers and she loves me" My Dad saying "I'm proud of you" My sibling laughter. Most of all...I hear my Beloved voice.

Of late I've been pondering grace. How I long to get it! No matter how hard I've tried it doesn't seem that I have even grasp what grace is. My Pastor has preach for many a weeks now on the subject of grace. Yet, it seems I can hardly get it. I want to. Grace? What is Grace? How do you receive grace? Well...I know for a fact with faith come grace and from grace comes healing. Jesus and Grace goes together, they can not be separated. Jesus is grace. Who is Jesus? The Son of God. The son of God? He is life. Grace... freedom. The ability to be free. Grace is the opposite of Legalistic. There's no list to make with Grace. Grace? For a five letter word grace gives a much deeper meaning than it appears.

Mercy...to forgive. Extended grace...to be saved or to save. Does mercy go with grace? My mind is wandering. I want to get so much what my Pastor is excited...no thrilled about! I long to understand. I pray that I may grasp the understanding of grace fully.

Forgive me if my writing is barely readable . My fingers have longed wanted to write, and my heart is heavy and yet light. Sometimes it is good to let random pondering thoughts peek out through the busy seasons. I hope next time my thoughts will be more organized, but tonight I just had to share.

My Best Friend

Today, is my dearest Kate's birthday. Two and Twenty years old, brown hair beauty has the prettiest blue eyes you'll see. This gorgeous woman of God is one of my dearest friend and I am so glad that she is my sister! May God bless her on this day!

A quote from Leaves of Gold

A world without a Sunday would be like a man without a smile, like a summer without flowers, and like a homstead without a garden. It is the joyous day of the whole week.
~Henry Ward Beecher

Now upon the first day of the week, very early in the morning, they came unto the sepulchre...
~Luke 24:1

A newspaper clip

Normally I don't read newspapers. There are only 3 reasons if I do. 1, for comics and puzzles ( I am sucker for comics especially Archie's) 2, cheap sales/coupons and 3, for jobs. At any rate, My grandparents have a newspaper subscription in which I eagerly go for the comics and puzzles. My eyes caught a Dear Annie clip. Since it was Thanksgiving I decided perhaps this time there will be something good, I'll learn something from this. I'm glad I did. Here down below is a clip from Dear Annie...please enjoy.



From Annie herself:



Today is Thanksgiving. We hope you are lucky enough to be spending the holiday with loving family and friends. Here's one of our favorite Thanksgiving pieces author unknown:

Thanksgiving Prayer,

We come to this table today, O Lord, Humble and thankful and glad. We thank thee first for the great miracle of life, for the exaltation of being human, for the capacity to love. We thank Thee for jobs both great and simple- For wonder, dreams, and hope; For the newness of each day For laughter and song and a merry heart; For compassion waiting within to be kindle; For the forbearance of Friend and the smile of a stranger, for the arching of the earth and trees and heavens and the fruit of all three; For the wisdom of the old; for the courage of the young; for the promise of the child; for the strength that comes when needed for this family united here today of those to whom much is given, much is required. May we and our children remember this. A-men



Dear Annie: I lived on the streets of Los Angeles from 2001 to 2003. I won't go into reasons why, but I didn't think I could go home. The ravages of homelessness took their tool on my eye-glasses pretty quickly. One of the earpieces was missing and a lens kept popping out. It was terribly demoralizing. People are less apt to give you opportunities to better yourself when you go beyond a certain point in appearance. I was ready to give up.

One day on impulse, I stopped into an eye wear boutique on Melrose Avenue. It was a nice store and I was bedraggled, so I expected to be immediately escorted out the door. That didn't happen. I asked the lady behind the counter how much it would cost for me to purchase on earpiece. I braced myself for a sarcastic comment, but instead she asked me to have a seat. She came back in about 5 minutes and said, "Try these one. Do they fit?" And then she handed me a brand now pair of frames. I stammered that I couldn't afford them and she replied, "don't worry, sweetie. You don't owe me anything."

I began to cry. She made a few adjustments and never flinched away from me in spite of my obvious need of a shower. She was kind enough to give me a drink of cold water. She even hugged me before I left.

I don't know the woman's name and cannot remember the name of the shop, but for years I've wanted to thank her for helping restore my dignity and preserve my safety. She also reminded me that there are wonderfully people in the world who don't judge you, based on your appearance or circumstances.
I give her much credit for my getting off the streets because shortly after that, I regained the courage to turn my life around. I'm now a wife and mother to a beautiful little boy, my family is speaking to me again, and I'm about to graduate from college.
Ma'am, if you're reading this, God bless you! Your kind gesture saved my life. I've been and will continue to paying it foreword to others in need, and you will be in my heart forever.
-I can see clearly now

There's not much I can say. Every time I read this clip, I sit in awe and with tears in my eyes. We do have the power to make a difference...the question is are we willing? Will we get outside of ourselves and reach out to others? Will we look past our comforts to look for those who need our help whether it is obvious or not? The choice is yours. What decision will you make?